How To: Talk Emotions With Your Kiddos!

Talking about feelings, both “good” and “bad,” with little ones can seem intimidating, but it doesn’t need to be!

Identifying and labeling emotions is an important skill set developed early in life. Being able to understand facial expressions starts as early as infancy, but is developed throughout childhood and adolescence (Maynard et al., 2011; Simcock et al., 2020). Scientists have identified SIX universal facial expressions that correspond to emotions: happy, sad, anxious, disgust, fear, and surprise (Simcock et al., 2020). Labeling and understanding these expressions and emotions helps us live happy, healthy, and social lives!

How Does It Impact You?

Let’s get into how emotion recognition impacts each and every one of us! Impairments in emotion recognition increase the likelihood of disruptive behaviors, such as tantrums (Morie et al., 2022; Wells et al., 2020). Think about a time you started feeling yourself become frustrated; what did you do to calm yourself down? Did you go for a walk? Talk to a friend? Now imagine you were unable to recognize that you were feeling that way so you didn’t engage in a calming activity. We likely wouldn’t respond in the best way either!

Along with decreasing disruptive behaviors, improvements in emotion recognition result in overall increased mental health and well-being  (Morie et al., 2022; Wells et al., 2020). Simcock and colleagues (2020) found that 12-year-olds with increased mental health concerns do a poorer job of identifying anger and fear facial expressions; therefore, they face greater challenges in labeling negative emotions. Again, think of a time you started becoming frustrated or upset. What if you had not identified you were feeling that way and responded in a way to calm those emotions? Have you ever felt “stuck” on something that upset you? Boy, it sure does not feel good!

Additionally, identifying others' emotions allows us to have successful social interactions (Simcock et al., 2020; Wells et al., 2020). Have you ever had someone act like everything was great when you were clearly upset? It can be off-putting! Having friends who recognize how we are feeling and empathize helps foster positive, supportive relationships. Children and adolescents with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism spectrum disorder (ASD), and conduct disorder can experience social deficits as a result of challenges with identifying others’ emotions, resulting in delays in the development of empathy (Maynard et al., 2011). Don’t worry, we have some ideas for conversations that can help foster the development of emotion recognition skills!

Let’s Break It Down!

Morie and colleagues’ (2022) model of emotion identification consists of 4 steps: baseline mood, monitoring, physiological response, and interoception/labeling. Below, find a breakdown of each step and how to target it!

1. Baseline Mood - This refers to our affect and how we feel in general (Morie et al., 2022). To promote baseline mood awareness, regularly and randomly talk about moods throughout the day - not just when feeling especially happy or sad! This can help your child become more aware of how they feel from moment to moment. To start, model this to your kiddos. For example, “I am feeling good this morning, my body feels rested and I ate a yummy breakfast. How does your body feel?”

2. Monitoring - This refers to identifying stimuli, either internal or in our environments, that could impact our emotions (but might not always!) (Morie et al., 2022). To help your kiddo monitor things that may impact their mood, chat about them! For example, “Oh wow, it sure is hot outside. Sometimes when I feel hot I can feel a little grouchy.” Or maybe, “It’s almost time for lunch. Sometimes when it’s time for food, my stomach grumbles and I can feel frustrated.” Try it out, you’ll be amazed by how many factors can impact our moods!

3. Physiological Response - This refers to the physiological or body responses that occur with emotions (Morie et al., 2022). Regularly talking about them, not only when they occur but also before they might arise, with your child can help them understand what they are feeling. For example, “Sometimes when I am REALLY excited, I get a weird butterfly feeling in my stomach! I sometimes get that feeling when I am nervous, too. That can be pretty confusing, huh?”

4. Interoception/Label - Last but not least, this refers to the recognition of our physiological responses and analysis of what may have caused it (Morie et al., 2022). Once again, let’s talk about it! Talking through how you determine what you’re feeling and why can help your little one do the same. For example, “Wow, my stomach kind of hurts and I feel a little shaky. Hmm… I sometimes feel like this when I’m nervous or when I’m hungry. Well, it is almost lunchtime - I must be hungry! Let’s get a snack and see if I feel better!” 

Did You Know?

Did you know that SENSE-ational Spaces can work with you and your family to develop calming spaces within your home focused on emotion identification and regulation? SENSE-ational Spaces can work alongside your family to generate ideas, create specific recommendations, and even implement modifications!  Check out our previous space transformations to see how we’ve supported other families! Additionally, check out our Instagram post all about activities focused on interoception!

References

Maynard, A. S., Monk, J. D., & Booker, K. W. (2011). Building empathy through identification and expression of emotions: A review of interactive tools for children with social deficits. Journal of Creativity in Mental Health, 6(2), 166–175. https://doi.org/10.1080/15401383.2011.579874 

Morie, K. P., Crowley, M. J., Mayes, L. C., & Potenza, M. N. (2022). The process of emotion identification: Considerations for psychiatric disorders. Journal of Psychiatric Research, 148, 264–274. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychires.2022.01.053 

Simcock, G., McLoughlin, L. T., De Regt, T., Broadhouse, K. M., Beaudequin, D., Lagopoulos, J., & Hermens, D. F. (2020). Associations between facial emotion recognition and mental health in early adolescence. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 17(1), 330. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph17010330 

Wells, A. E., Hunnikin, L. M., Ash, D. P., & van Goozen, S. H. (2020). Improving emotion recognition is associated with subsequent mental health and well-being in children with severe behavioural problems. European Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 30(11), 1769–1777. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00787-020-01652-y